so ha!

Well its been confirmed...

I knew the voices where right- i heard from my own brother...

Im bitchy, Im rude mean, and not a very nice person. They honestly dont respect or trust me. In short they dont like me.....


When i see trevor next I will talk with him about just moving in.... i cant live with people that dont like me. I TOLD everyone they didnt want me around... they didnt like me... now i have prof!!!!


Have i been kinda bitchy to them, yeah.. sure but thats cause MOUSE has been bitchy to me and im sick of being nice, sick of being who she wants me to be. so i get uptight and they get the brunt of my anger (only when they piss me off... not just at no time for no reason).

I am also lazy... they never once stop to think that maybe one of the things im doing on my computer is trying to get a job or futher my education... noooo they dont see me.. the never heard me so i MUST be just a big fat mucher who has nothing to offer anyone in this family.*

Shall i add im only nice when im around trevor or when i want something... so add manipulative to the list....


I suck so badly if i wasnt leaving for this beach trip... damn stright i'd start cutting again... maybe that would get my anger out with out them getting it at all... i'd rather suffer forever then make them hurt.... But if i have to stay here with them..... then yes, im sorry but i WILL start back up.
my own family cant stand me that really really really hurts.




*a very good very vaild point has been removed cause its NOT my secret to tell... Mouse and Ben want to stop me from spreading joy when nearly everyone at church knows.... but i refuse to say a word till they say i can cause i RESPECT them..... assholes