So I think God is starting work in my heart some more... I am finally starting to realize that the feelings i have for my crush are real and yet... its not him i care for, but who he is, the idea of him... his attitude, and his heart for God. I went looking through some old journals of mine and found a list of things i want in a husband and yes he fit most of them... but, that fact didn't make me love him more it just help soildify that he is a good guy, and i could get along with someone LIKE him... but that doesnt mean HE is perfect for me in any way.
So yes... things in my heart are calming down, lets just hope they can stay clam.
Mean while.... things with a former crush are very cool. I can't believe that we are still friends. More than that we are almost family, and he is just about begging me not to leave. He sounds so pathetic... "I really wish you didn't have to go. I want you to stay" He is just like a little kid.... tis so sweet.
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